It Comes at Night (2017)
Trey Edward Shults
Editor’s Note: Please account for the alcohol creeping through my veins like adolescent worms in the girl’s locker room.
This review shall be in real time, because why not? Well sort of. I am 20 minutes in and still I know not what is going down. I think there is a disease making folks unfriendly. A family is holed up, trying to keep others out.
The main actor, Joel Edgerton, looks so much like Jeremiah Johnson that I can’t concentrate on anything else. My wife isn’t feeling well and that upsets me.
Are we sure that I am not watching an episode of The Walking Dead? Because if I am, I am going to be super upset that I have to re-write this. Really though, I haven’t seen a zombie, but the feeling is very similar. People are the real monsters, yada, yada. Can Jeremiah trust the new people? Fuck no, don’t be stupid. People suck.
I mean it though. People really do suck. Better to find one you like and likes you. Then just hole up and wait for death while trying to have as much sex as you can. That is, in all reality, the meaning of life. See, these drunk posts are for the good of all mankind. If only more people read this crap, I could save the world.
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